


WTF Are Human Fairy Tales?

by metalshootingstar



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 12:45:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12582196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metalshootingstar/pseuds/metalshootingstar
Summary: The paladins try to explain fairytales to Allura and Coran…and hilarity ensues.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set in Season 2, Inspired by this Harry Potter Fanfiction Which tbh you should totally read as well as all of its sister one shots, which you can find here. Enjoy!

“ We told you to be up for training three hours ago Lance!” Exclaimed Keith angrily. Shiro pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to remain as calm as he could. He hoped that after all they’d been through, Lance and Keith would at some point reach a……compromise. beside him Hunk and Pidge were sitting there just watching this unfold. 

“ Hey! I need my beauty sleep!” Exclaimed Lance. 

“ Oh yeah, you’re a regular sleeping beauty you little-”  
“ What’s a sleeping beauty?” Asked Allura’s voice from the entrance. 

“ Why you are babe, the fairest most beautiful sleeping beauty in the universe.” Said Lance, immediately switching to flirty, lover boy mode. The others immediately rolled their eyes. 

“Uh, thank you Lance?” Said Allura, with a slight uncomfortable chuckle.   
“ It’s a fairytale, y’know just a kid’s story.” Said Keith, as he sat down on the couch. 

“ Oh! May I hear it?” Asked Allura, she didn’t know much about Earth or anything much about human culture. However, it sounded very interesting. Coran popped up, behind her and smiled. 

“ Count me in! They say one of the best ways to learn about other cultures is to learn about their stories and folklore. “ Said Coran, the paladins looked to each other. That was a strange request, but well they had nothing better to do. 

“ Ok, I’ll tell you babe.” Said Lance. “ Once upon a time.”

“ What is that?” Asked Allura.

“ Once upon a time? It’s another way of saying a long time ago. All fairytales start out like that. Anyway, uh once upon a time in a faraway land there was a king and queen who had tried for many years to have a baby. One day, they were blessed with a beautiful princess.” Said Lance, as Allura and Coran sat down before him paying rapt attention. 

“ The King and Queen invited three fairies to-”

“ Not to interrupt again but, what’s a fairy?” Asked Coran. 

“ A fairy is a mythological creature, that looks like a tiny human with wings coming out of its back that uses magic. Sometimes good and sometimes bad, depending on the story you’re telling or the culture they originate from. European cultures, especially the ancient Celts believed that the fairy, or the fair folk were creatures that loved to mess around with mortals. Americans though see fairies as good little creatures who grant wishes and use their magic to help people.” Explained Pidge, before pausing for a bit and looking up, as the others were looking at her. “ What? I was a kid who loved to read about ancient myths and stuff.”

“ They sound so interesting!” Exclaimed Allura, making a mental note to ask Pidge for more information about fairies later. 

“ Anyway, these three fairies were good, and were invited to the baby’s birthday. hey each gave her gifts. One gave her beauty, the second gave her the gift of a beautiful singing voice.” Explained Lance. 

“ Oh, yeah because that’s totally going to help you be a good ruler.” Said Keith, sarcastically. 

“ I’m sure she wasn’t only beautiful and was more than her singing voice.” Said Allura, immediately defending the princess. 

“ Well anyway, before the third fairy could give her gift an evil fairy appeared. She was angry over having not been invited, so she placed a curse on the princess. “ Said Lance, before clearing his throat and making his voice sound like an evil witch’s. “ On her sixteenth birthday, she will prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel and die.”

“ What?!” Exclaimed Allura in horror. “ And this is a children’s story?”

“ Yeah, hard to believe right? You should see the Disney version.” Said Hunk, with a small chuckle. 

“ What’s a Disney?” Asked Coran. 

“ Oh, uh long story short Disney is this huge major corporation founded by Walt Disney. They make movies, shows, musicals, games….and they own everything.They take fairytales and they make them more kid friendly, but eh that’s a whole other topic. “ Said Hunk. 

“ What happened next?” Asked Allura worriedly. 

“ Well, the evil fairy left, and the king an queen were heartbroken and asked the fairies for help. The third fairy, who didn’t get to give her gift then said I can’t stop the curse as it’s too powerful but I can change it. The princess will still prick her finger, but she won’t die merely fall into a deep slumber to be awakened through true love’s kiss.” Said Lance, Allura smiled and sighed softly as that sounded so romantic. He cleared his throat and smiled. “ W-well uh so the king and queen didn’t want to take any chances so they banned spindles and spinning wheels. Which meant there were no new clothes.”

“ Oh, quite the predicament.” Said Coran, twirling his mustache. 

“ Yup, so sixteen years later, the King and Queen get in their carriage and go to trade some gold for new cloth in another kingdom. Which meant The princess was left alone, and she was exploring her castle when she came upon a room she never saw before.-”

“ The story makes no sense.” Said Keith, prompting the others to look at him. “ One. If the fairy could change the curse, why didn’t she just change it so that the princess didn’t prick her finger. Two, sixteen years with no new cloth? Really? I hardly think that’s possible, and finally she’s lived in this castle all her life how can this room be one she’d never seen before?”

“ …Dude, it’s a story….relax.” Said Hunk. 

“ A kid’s story too, it’s not supposed to make sense it’s supposed to teach you morals.” Said Pidge. 

“ Yeah Keith, so stay out of it!” Exclaimed Lance.  
Keith rolled his eyes and turned to Shiro…who just shrugged, honestly he hadn’t heard the story since he was a kid and he liked this. It was nice. 

“ Oh go on Lance, what happened?!” Said Allura. 

“ Ok, so the princess found a spindle in the room, which was off. So, she went to it, wondering just what it was. She then touched the spindle, and collapsed asleep.” Said Lance, even falling over theatrically much to Allura and Coran’s shock. He stood and sat back down “ When the king and queen returned, they found out their daughter was asleep forced to sleep until true love’s kiss. Sadly the King and Queen decided to ask the good fairies to put the rest of the kingdom to sleep until the princess was awakened.”

“ Are you alright Allura?” Asked Shiro, when he noticed the tears welling in her eyes. Lance’s eyes widened, when he realized that the story was currently hitting a little close to home for Allura. A princess forced to sleep for a long time, only….this time there was no kingdom awaiting her when she woke up. 

“ Oh man I’m sorry Allura! W-we can totally stop!” Exclaimed Lance. 

“ N-no, I apologize…..it just reminded me of…..well, you can keep going.” Said Allura. 

“ You sure? I mean we don’t have to keep going.” Said Lance, not wanting to upset her anymore. 

“ Really, I’m alright…I want to hear how the story ends.” Said Allura with a soft smile. Coran gently placed a comforting hand on her shoulder to which she reciprocated. 

“ If you’re sure, now a hundred years later there was a prince who was riding by. The Prince having heard the tale of the sleeping beauty, decided to see if it was true. He entered the castle, and in the highest room in the tallest tower was the princess. He immediately fell in love with her at first sight. Now uh….you guys want the Disney version or the real version?” Asked Lance. 

“ There are different versions?” Asked Coran. 

“ Oh yeah, the Disney or kid version is much different than the other version. See, Disney, as Hunk mentioned toned down the stories and changed a lot of them to make them kid friendly. The original fairytales were meant to teach lessons, bestow morals, and educate people. To warn them, so….yeah there are different versions. Even them some details differ depending on who tells it.” Explained Pidge. 

“ Well, lets hear them both!” Exclaimed Coran. The paladins shared a knowing look, before turning to the two Alteans. 

“ Ok, so kid friendly version is, the prince goes over kisses the princess with true love’s kiss and the curse is lifted thus they live happily ever after. “ Said Lance. “ Now, the original version uh….she doesn’t wake up with a kiss.”

“ She doesn’t?”

“ How does she wake up?” 

“ Well, she wakes up after giving birth to twins.” Said Lance, pausing as the implication sunk in to the two Alteans. 

“ Uh lets stick with the children’s version, oh but what happened to the fairies?” Asked Coran. 

“ Oh their never brought up again.” Said Lance. “ You get used to it, in fairytales characters come in and go out and are never mentioned again unless their a major character.”

“ What was the princess’ name?” Asked Allura curiously. 

“ Most versions call her Briar Rose but….huh funnily enough the Disney version, sounds like your name. Aurora.” Said Hunk, Allura smiled softly as she and Coran shared a look. 

“ The story was wonderful Lance.” Said Allura. 

“ Yes! Do you have more?” Asked Coran. 

“ Oh do we.” Said Lance with a smirk. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, the general consensus, was that Cinderella should be the next fairytale so here we go! The Paladins tell Coran and Allura the tale of Cinderella

" Oh man, I got a good one." Said Hunk, as he set aside what he was working on. Coran and Allura turned their attention to Hunk, who immediately cleared his throat. " Ok, so this is the story of Cinderella. It's my grandma's favorite, and was my first Disney movie. Anyway, Once upon a time, there was a man and woman who loved their daughter very much. Unfortunately, the mother died leaving her husband and their daughter behind."

Allura winced slightly, odd that these human stories seemed to bring to mind parts of her life that brought her pain. Then again, it was most likely just a coincidence. 

" The father thought she needed a mother though, so he scoured the land searching for someone to be a mother to his daughter. He ends up meeting this one woman, who had two daughters of her own." Said Hunk, as Allura's eyes lit up. 

" Oh how fun! I'm sure she must have loved having sisters." Said Allura, while she wasn't sure about a stepmother she would have loved having stepsisters. The paladins shared a look, much to the Alteans' confusion...wasn't this a good thing? Hunk chuckled slightly nervously. 

" Well.....we'll get to that." Said Hunk. " So after he married her the dad died, leaving his daughter with her stepmom and stepsisters. Who immediately showed their true colors, the stepmother hated her stepdaughter and treated her like a servant in her own home. Her stepsisters were jealous of her beauty, so they often forced her to dress in rags and sleep by the fireplace which left her full of cinders on her face and clothes. Which, earned her the name Cinderella."

" Wait, they renamed her?" Asked Coran in confusion. 

" Yeah, the story's kind of weird like that. Most versions of the story, give her another name and have Cinderella be a name her evil stepfamily uses to make fun of her. Usually Ella." Said Lance. 

" This is....a very sad story." Said Allura. 

" Yeah i starts off pretty depressing, but it gets better trust me." Said Hunk. " Anyway, one day the King decided to hold a ball so that his son the prince could find a bride. All the eligible ladies in the land were invited, and Cinderella asked her family if she could go. Her stepmother said 'If you finish all your chores, then you may'."

" Oh that's...suspiciously nice." Said Coran. 

" Indeed, " Said Allura, after all why would the evil stepmother allow her to go if she hated her so much?

" Well Cinderella didn't think so, she did all her chores but unfortunately there were so many she didn't have time to focus on her own dress. The family left without her, and Cinderella was left distraught." Said Hunk. 

" Man, I never realized just how....sad this story was. Cinderella has a happy family then her mom dies, she gets a stepfamily then her dad dies and they abuse her, she gets to go to a ball...and they leave her. " Said Pidge. 

" Yeah! Cinderella's life sucks!" Exclaimed Lance. 

" Well maybe that's the point. It makes us sympathize with her, and want her to succeed. She goes through all that hardship, and it all ends up being worth it in the end when she gets the happy ending. To show that no matter how much adversity and hardships you face in your life, there's still something to hope for." Said Shiro, trying to be the voice of reason. 

" .....Ok Shiro has a point." Said Lance, as Pidge and Keith shrugged noting he did. 

" Anyway, so as Cinderella was left alone then who should arrive but her fairy godmother." Said Hunk.

" But....if she had a fairy Godmother why didn't she show up earlier? How did a fairy become her Godmother?" Asked Coran. 

"Never explained....ever." Said Keith in slight annoyance. 

" Yeah huge plothole, one of two actually. Anyway, so her Fairy Godmother turns mice into horses, a pumpkin into a carriage, and her rags into a dress with matching glass slippers. However, the Fairy Godmother told her that she had to arrive before midnight otherwise the spell would be broken." Said Hunk. 

" What? But in Sleeping Beauty the Evil Fairy was powerful enough to kill her and the good fairies were able to change the curse. Both of which lasted for a hundred years, and yet this fairy had a time limit of midnight?" Exclaimed Allura, and immediately the paladins froze because....that was a very good point actually. 

" Maybe she wasn't that strong of a fairy?" Said Pidge, trying to come up with an explanation. " Or maybe transformation spells work differently than sleeping curses."

" I suppose....also glass slippers? That's....impractical." Said Allura. 

" Yeah, the slippers depend on the version, one of them makes the shoes fur but....glass is the most popular. Anyway, so Cinderella made her way to the ball where there were many women ready to dance with the prince. The moment he saw her though, the prince fell in love and the two danced the night away...until the clock struck midnight. When it did, Cinderella ran up the stairs losing one of her slippers in the process. " Explained Hunk. " The next day, the prince decided to search the land for the maiden whose foot fit the slipper."

" Did the prince not remember what she looked like? Did he even ask her name?" Asked Coran. 

" Nope, I mean some modern retellings have it be at a masquerade or have her hide her identity....but yeah princey has no excuse." Said Lance. 

" Not only that, but is she really the only one whose foot would fit?" Asked Allura. 

" It's a magic slipper, conjured up by a fairy who turned mice to horses and pumpkins into carriages.....are you really surprised that it doesn't really hold up to reality?" Asked Keith. 

" You have a point." Said Allura. " Though how small was his kingdom or rather how big is his ballroom that every eligible maiden in the land could go to the ball?"

" Well that part is actually plausible. In those days, a young girl was supposed to marry as soon as she reached maturity which in those days was 13? 14? and at around 19 or 20 is when she's considered to be too old for marrying age...mid twenties if you want to stretch it out to make it less creepy. Mostly because in those days, especially since its the prince of all people you needed to have descendants in order to continue your family line. So lets say at the youngest those at the ball were 14 and at the oldest...24. So the prince would look for a girl from the ages of 14 to 24, and considering the ball was held for all the eligible ladies....but Cinderella despite being eligible wasn't originally supposed to go. Meaning not every maiden would have gone, only those who're high to lower middle class, so that leaves out servants.  So he's looking for a girl 14-24, high to middle class, and whose foot fits the magic slipper." Explained Pidge, who paused as everyone was looking at her strangely. " Sorry."

" No,no that's interesting actually, and a good answer for an annoying plothole." Said Lance encouragingly. 

" Ok, so finally the prince makes his way to Cinderella's home, and the stepmother having heard of the slipper. Goes to her first stepdaughter and uh...this isn't included in the Disney version but....well....she cuts off her daughter's toes so that her foot would fit." Explained Hunk, immediately Allura and Coran tensed up and looked at him as if discerning whether he was joking or not.....when he wasn't. 

" She...cut off...her toes?" Asked Allura 

" Yeah, and she put on the slipper. Somehow no one noticed the blood, but they decided she was the maiden...until a little birdy told the prince ' this isn't the princess, she's bleeding from her feet'. So they take her back, and the stepmother cut off her other daughter's heel so that it could fit." 

" She...mutilated her daughter's feet?" Asked Coran, as he and Allura looked on in horror. 

" Yeah, mother of the year right?" Said Pidge sarcastically. 

" So, the second stepsister gets labeled as the maiden.....only for the bird to go ' no look at her foot its bleeding' and they take her back. So the prince asks if there's any other maidens who live in the house. When Cinderella comes out, and the stepmother in all her jealousy breaks the slipper. Cinderella though pulls out the other one, and lo and behold it fit! No foot chopping necessary. Cinderella and the prince were married and lived happily ever after." Said Hunk. 

" Well that's a relief." Said Allura with a small chuckle. 

" What about her stepfamily?" Asked Coran. 

" Oh dude, not only do they get mutilated they get their eyes pecked out by ravens....but that part is usually left out." Said Lance. 

" That was...something." Said Coran. " Enjoyable but....something."

" Indeed, are they all like that?" Asked Allura. 

" Yeah, though I know a story that's less gory." Said Pidge. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next story: Robin Hood! After that The Little Mermaid, then Red Riding Hood, afterwards I am open to suggestions!

**Author's Note:**

> What Fairytale, would you like to see next?


End file.
